Do men go to baby showers?
If you are a man who has been invited to a baby shower, should you attend?
The rise in popularity of baby showers has come hand-in-hand with the question of whether men should or should not go.
And if you are unsure whether or not men should be present at a baby shower, this article will help you make an informed decision about inviting men as well as whether or not you, as a male, should attend.
Of course, if you are the host and would like men to attend, there is nothing wrong with inviting your male friends and family members. There is, after all, no hard rule against men attending, and men can attend if invited.
For males presented with the opportunity of attending a baby shower, however, the answer can depend on various factors, including the relationship between the mother-to-be and the guests, whether other men are attending, and, of course, whether a formal invite has been offered.
So, men do go to baby showers. But if you are considering whether or not you should go, the following questions will help you arrive at an informed decision.
Am I Formally Invited?
Before deciding whether or not to attend a baby shower, you need to know if you were invited. The invitation may come in several forms.
It could be as simple as a phone call from the mother-to-to-be saying that she would like to invite you to a shower, or it could be a formal invitation sent by mail.
If you were not invited, it’s probably best to play it safe and not attend. This can lead to an awkward and uncomfortable environment – especially if you were not expected at the baby shower and, as a result, run the risk of being the only male in attendance.
Am I Close To The Mother-To-Be?
If you are close to the mother-to-become, then it can be appropriate for you to attend. This can include if your partner is a close friend of the mother-to-be, or if the mother-to-be is, in fact, a close relation of yours, such as a sister.
Still, it would be worth confirming if you are invited and expected to attend.
If you are not close to the mother-to-be – in friendship or kinship – it can result in the other guests questioning your presence, as well as your reasoning behind attending.
However, as mentioned, if your partner is close to the mother-to-be (even though you are not), it can be a passable excuse to attend.
Do I Know The Guests?
Similar to asking how close you are to the mother-to-be, it’s worth evaluating who might be at the baby shower.
If the invited guests are your friends or close acquaintances, this can reduce the risk of awkwardness or uncomfortableness – even if you are the only male present.
Due to this, it’s important to ask who might be going, as being familiar with the other guests will make it easier to fit in, make conversation, and enjoy the celebration without causing everyone to feel on edge.
Will There Be Baby Shower Games?
If the mother-to-be has stated that there will be games or entertainment at the shower, then it can be a good indicator that the baby shower will be more involving of its guests, which can include both women and men.
Despite that, it’s worth getting an idea of what games will be played. Games that are chosen without men in mind would result in you being left out, or accommodated to participate in a way that makes everyone feel awkward.
Can I Join In The Conversation?
It’s possible to make small talk with guests at a baby shower. However, if you are the only male present, the conversation may quickly dry up, leaving you as a silent bystander praying for any excuse to make a quick dash for the front door.
If you are a father or uncle, on the other hand, this can be a sign that you will be able to participate in the general conversation of most baby showers, which can be a good reason to go.
Another good sign is if you are close to all of the guests, or if other male acquaintances are present at the party.
Will There Be Other Men Attending?
Building on the above point, if other men are going to be present, then you can go. This means that other men are formally invited, which is also good news for you if you are worried about feeling left out or unwelcome.
As a result, it’s worth asking either the host or other (male) acquaintances, such as family members and close friends, whether they are invited.
What can be even more important is confirming that they are, in fact, going to attend, so you don’t arrive to find out that you are the only man there.
Can I Still Attend As The Only Man Present?
Of course! If you are formally invited and close to the guests and mother-to-be, there is nothing stopping you from attending any baby shower – even if you are the sole man in attendance.
You might have been asked to help with the preparation of the baby shower, and serving of the food, or simply requested to attend due to your closeness and familiarity with the mother-to-be and the other guests who are attending.
In any case, there is no rule that men should not attend baby showers or even anything that should prevent men from enjoying baby showers – provided that you are happy to get involved.
Baby showers can be fun, enlightening, and a great way to meet new people.
So, while some baby showers may exclude men, others won’t. Overall, it will depend on individual circumstances.
If you are a man who is unsure, check to see if you have been invited (formally or informally) and whether other men are going to be present by asking the people you know are invited.
Asking the mother-to-be can result in pressuring her to accommodate you – in the case that men were not, in fact, invited – so this is best avoided if you don’t want to be the only male in attendance.
Ultimately, men do and can attend baby showers. It only comes down to whether or not men are invited and expected to attend.
Carly Link, a 33-year old mother of two toddlers. She is a parent and goes through a lot of the usual parenting difficulties herself. Carly shares all her experiences and knowledge about the best baby products through this blog.